My experience was toxic
386
2日前
My experience was toxic
305日前
Now I know one star is harsh and maybe someone else might like the server. And I don't even know if a review of this sort is even... allowed or allowable? But I was in this server for about 10 months before leaving, and I had an overall pretty bad experience. I would get dogpiled on there like, all the time. Schooled, taken down, generally received what I would always perceive as hostility. The possibilities are either the people in there (which in my esperience included the staff too) just let themselves go and be too harsh, or I'm just really sensitive (which is true, I know that of myself, although when I would say so it wouldn't... change anything. I'm autistic too)
So this server caused a lot of harm for me, it was absolutely a net harm for me. According to my own narrative I was singled out and dogpiled consistently/regularly/frequently, which would always ruin my days and neither did this behavior cease, nor did anyone in the moderation come to me and try to be compassionate. I didn't feel like I could receive compassion and empathy on there, everyone was an enemy basically because I was/am a little more naive/ingenuous given my age. Also just too much politics from my 10 months of experience, and I would get the feeling I wasn't enough and I had to be more certain and more of a believer than I already was- if you simply didn't know better you'd get dogpiled and shown no compassion and treated as a monster.
Now of course, what mental ailments develop in my head is not on the people in the server or the server itself directly, and I will concede that part of this issue lies in my sensitivity and autism which make every bad thing x10 times worse for me, meaning that if sometimes I feel like I'm being singled out and everyone hates me, that's a common anxiety and the server in its specifics doesn't have much to do with it. However, I am very disappointed about my prolonged treatment in that server. I was the punching bag- or at least I felt like it, and nobody ever stopped this or acknowledged it or tried to change it. More than half of the people that I remember from the server would participate in it. So yeah, I know 1 star is harsh and maybe there is some good- I didn't enjoy it and even the on topic parts of the server... it felt like they were nonexistent to me (for certain I had an unhealthy relation with this server), they barely weigh in. I guess I could give it 2 stars but I would rather err on the side of caution. And again I am very upset about my experience in this and I can't whitewash it, it ruined the contemporary me. I surely hope this server becomes normal but I'm never joining it again. The whole atmosphere even feels kind of like Twitter from my recalling.
So this server caused a lot of harm for me, it was absolutely a net harm for me. According to my own narrative I was singled out and dogpiled consistently/regularly/frequently, which would always ruin my days and neither did this behavior cease, nor did anyone in the moderation come to me and try to be compassionate. I didn't feel like I could receive compassion and empathy on there, everyone was an enemy basically because I was/am a little more naive/ingenuous given my age. Also just too much politics from my 10 months of experience, and I would get the feeling I wasn't enough and I had to be more certain and more of a believer than I already was- if you simply didn't know better you'd get dogpiled and shown no compassion and treated as a monster.
Now of course, what mental ailments develop in my head is not on the people in the server or the server itself directly, and I will concede that part of this issue lies in my sensitivity and autism which make every bad thing x10 times worse for me, meaning that if sometimes I feel like I'm being singled out and everyone hates me, that's a common anxiety and the server in its specifics doesn't have much to do with it. However, I am very disappointed about my prolonged treatment in that server. I was the punching bag- or at least I felt like it, and nobody ever stopped this or acknowledged it or tried to change it. More than half of the people that I remember from the server would participate in it. So yeah, I know 1 star is harsh and maybe there is some good- I didn't enjoy it and even the on topic parts of the server... it felt like they were nonexistent to me (for certain I had an unhealthy relation with this server), they barely weigh in. I guess I could give it 2 stars but I would rather err on the side of caution. And again I am very upset about my experience in this and I can't whitewash it, it ruined the contemporary me. I surely hope this server becomes normal but I'm never joining it again. The whole atmosphere even feels kind of like Twitter from my recalling.
